The Other Side Of Rape

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A couple of weeks ago, the social media space was awash with news of allegations of rape leveled by a prominent twitter figure, Sugabelly, against the son of a late former governor. These allegations might be true or false but one thing is clear; rape is a serious issue which the society should not treat with levity. I detest rape and I am sure every human with a heart will feel the same way too.

However, there is a side to rape that most of us tend to ignore and some are even amused at the thought of it. This type of rape is female-on-male rape ; a situation where a male is raped by a female (sounds laughable right?).

Before going any further, let us look at the definition of rape: “the act of forcing sexual intercourse upon another person without their consent or against their will”.

This definition goes to show that a male or female human being could be raped since the word “person” refers to both sexes.

A look around the internet will reveal cases where males were either drugged or threatened with violence by females who thereafter had sex with them.

Now some people will ask how it is possible for a man to have an erection when he doesn’t want to have sex. The answer is simple: the human body is a complex structure and we have little or no control over how our body reacts to sexual stimulus. Any man reading this will understand that “Junior”, has a mind of its own and that the erectile function is an entirely involuntary action. The involuntary nature of the reproductive system is the reason why women can reach orgasm while being raped (yes, it is possible).

Chastising a man for getting an erection and sleeping with a woman against his will is highly reprehensible. The fear of being mocked or condemned outright has hugely contributed to the unwillingness of several female-on-male rape victims to come out with their stories.

The victims who bother to speak out are drowned with so many cruel statements/questions like “The guy obviously enjoyed it, he is lying jare”, ”How can a woman overpower a man?”, “Wetin he find go there?” “So, when he dey ram the woman, he no know say na rape abi? Mtchew! #SipsWestGermanyJuice”. Some even have the guts to post one fraudulent custom auction sale or the other.  For God’s sake, somebody just got raped!

The current laws in our country are unfair to the male folk as they do not envisage the possibility of a male being raped by a female (except in the case of a minor). This flaw in our laws has made it possible for female rapists to walk free on the streets while their male victims are left traumatised. 

Female-on-male rape could be carried out in a number of ways which include coercion, intimidation, violence, drug inducement and other vile ways rapists use to achieve their aims. This happens every day right under our noses in our homes, offices, places of worship and other places.

Female-on-male rape victims hurt as much as female rape victims. They are also exposed to psychological trauma, depression, eating disorders, Genophobia, risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases and condemnation by some sections of the society.

It is hypocritical to condemn a type of rape and ignore the other. Let us all stand today and say no to rape irrespective of the gender of the victim. 

This is the other side of rape and i am giving a voice to the men who can't speak!